Coping with Death During Natural Disasters
Natural disasters can strike without warning, leaving devastation in their wake. Recently, the floods in Western North Carolina have been a sobering reminder of how quickly life can change. My own family was affected, though we were incredibly fortunate compared to others who lost so much more. We are deeply thankful for our safety, but the heartbreak of watching our community grieve is indescribable.
As a death doula, I’ve seen firsthand the profound impact of sudden loss, but natural disasters bring a unique layer of trauma and sorrow. In times like these, it can be hard to know how to cope with such overwhelming grief. Whether you’ve lost a loved one, your home, or your sense of security, there are ways to navigate the storm of emotions that follow disasters like the recent floods. Please be gentle and patient with yourself, you are processing so much right now, allow yourself the time and space to feel your feelings and no judge yourself for them. Although it may not seem like it now, you will overcome and you will be ok.
Processing Sudden Loss and Trauma
The floods in Western NC came swiftly, leaving many people without the chance to prepare for the worst. In the aftermath, the weight of grief, shock, and confusion can feel unbearable. People have lost homes, livelihoods, and loved ones, and are left trying to piece their lives back together amidst the devastation.
If you’ve experienced a sudden loss, it’s vital to acknowledge that it’s okay to feel a mix of emotions—whether that’s anger, disbelief, or even numbness. The grief that comes after a disaster isn’t just about mourning a person; it’s also about mourning the loss of safety and stability.
Finding Support in Community
One of the silver linings I’ve seen in Western NC is the resilience and togetherness of our communities. While the destruction has been vast, so too has the support for one another. Neighbors helping neighbors, people opening their homes, and communities rallying to rebuild remind us of the importance of leaning on each other in difficult times.
This storm has taught me how many people truly love me, reminding me just how important it is to to tell people how much I love them and appreciate them.
If you’ve lost a loved one or are feeling overwhelmed by the floods, I encourage you to reach out for support. It could be as simple as talking to a friend, connecting with a grief counselor or doula, or even joining a community-led recovery group. You don’t have to navigate the pain alone, and sometimes just having a hand to hold or a kind ear can make all the difference.
Honoring the Lives Lost in the Floods
For those who lost loved ones in the floods, the added pain of not being able to properly say goodbye can feel devastating. Natural disasters often prevent traditional ceremonies or rituals, but there are still meaningful ways to honor the lives of those who have passed.
In my own practice as a death doula, I’ve seen how small acts of remembrance—lighting a candle, sharing stories, or creating a memory space—can provide comfort in times of grief. Western NC is filled with strong, resilient people, and I’ve already seen beautiful tributes emerging. Consider joining or creating a memorial space in your community, whether that’s online, through a local vigil, or even through art. These moments of connection can bring solace during dark times.
Coping with Guilt and Gratitude
Survivor’s guilt is something many are feeling after the floods in Western NC, myself included. My family was spared from the worst, and while I’m immensely thankful for that, it’s hard not to feel a sense of guilt when others have suffered so much. This is a normal response, and if you’re feeling similarly, know that you’re not alone.
The key is to channel those feelings of guilt into gratitude and action. Being thankful for what we have, while also using our energy to help those less fortunate, can provide a sense of purpose. Whether it’s donating, volunteering with relief efforts, or simply offering a listening ear to those in mourning, every small act helps the healing process.
Resources for the People of Western NC
The path to recovery after such a disaster is long and difficult, but there are resources available to support those in need. Here are some organizations providing relief and assistance to those affected by the floods in Western NC:
North Carolina Disaster Relief Fund – Accepting donations to help flood victims rebuild homes and lives. Visit here to donate or seek assistance.
Red Cross of Western North Carolina – Offering emergency shelter, food, and emotional support. You can find local resources at Red Cross NC.
NC Voluntary Organizations Active in Disaster (NC VOAD) – Coordinating efforts between local organizations and volunteers to support long-term recovery efforts. More info at NC VOAD.
Hope 4 NC Crisis Counseling Program – Free crisis counseling and support for those experiencing emotional distress due to the disaster. You can reach them at 1-855-587-3463 or online at Hope 4 NC.
MountainTrue – A local environmental organization working to restore and protect the affected areas in Western NC. They also offer guidance on community rebuilding. Learn more at MountainTrue.
The United Way of Western NC – Offering financial support, volunteer coordination, and resources for families in crisis. Find more information at United Way WNC.
Navigating Complex Emotions
With all the upheaval, it’s important to remember that it’s okay to feel conflicted. You might feel grateful one moment and devastated the next, or guilty about what you’ve survived. This emotional rollercoaster is normal, especially in times of crisis. Again reminding you to be patient with yourself, it takes time.
To manage these emotions, try to take things one day at a time. Practice small acts of self-care—whether it’s taking a walk in nature, calling a friend, or meditating on gratitude. Healing will take time, and it’s okay to ask for help when you need it.
Final Thoughts
The floods in Western NC have taken a great toll, but they’ve also shown us the strength and compassion that exists within our communities. As a death doula, I’ve learned that in times of great loss, it’s the connections we foster and the small acts of remembrance that help us heal.
If you or someone you know is struggling with grief in the wake of this disaster, know that you are not alone. Reach out, share your story, and allow your community to support you through this difficult time. Healing is possible, even when the loss feels insurmountable.