Advance Care Planning: Why It’s Never Too Early to Start the Conversation
Advance Care Planning: Why It’s Never Too Early to Start the Conversation
When we think about planning for the future, we often imagine dream vacations, retirement goals, or maybe even career shifts. But one conversation that rarely makes the list—yet is just as important—is talking about our wishes for care at the end of life. It’s called Advance Care Planning, and despite what many people believe, it’s not just for the elderly or terminally ill. It’s for all of us.
That’s why I chose the image of a dandelion, because just like a single puff can scatter seeds far and wide, one thoughtful conversation can create a ripple effect. It can bring peace of mind to those you love and inspire others to begin their own planning too. What starts as one small act can carry farther than you think.
Let’s talk about why.
What Is Advance Care Planning, Really?
Advance care planning is about making decisions now—while you’re healthy and clear-minded about the kind of care you’d want if you ever became seriously ill, injured, or unable to speak for yourself. This includes:
Choosing a healthcare proxy (someone who can make medical decisions on your behalf)
Completing advance directives like a living will
Talking openly about your values, beliefs, and what matters most to you when it comes to quality of life
In short: it’s a love letter to your future self—and to your loved ones.
The Myth of “Too Soon”
Many people put off these conversations because they feel too young, too healthy, or simply too uncomfortable. But here's the truth:
The best time to plan is before you need to.
Accidents and sudden illness don’t wait for a convenient moment. Without a plan in place, families are often left making stressful or high-stakes decisions in the middle of crisis—sometimes guessing at what their loved one would have wanted.
By having the conversation early, you’re giving yourself peace of mind and giving your family the priceless gift of clarity.
Why Advance Care Planning Is an Act of Self-Care
We tend to think of self-care as face masks and bubble baths, and while those are certainly lovely, and you should treat yourself to that after you finish this blog ;) but true self-care is also about advocacy. It’s about speaking up for yourself—especially in moments when you may not be able to. Advance care planning is a way to ensure that your voice is still heard, no matter what.
How to Start the Conversation
It doesn’t have to be formal or somber. In fact, the more relaxed the better.
You can start with questions like:
“Have you ever thought about the kind of care you’d want if you couldn’t make decisions for yourself?”
“If something unexpected happened to me, I want you to know my wishes—can we talk about it?”
“What does a ‘good death’ mean to you?”
Whether you're talking with your partner, your parents, or your adult children, the goal is the same : open dialogue without judgement
It’s a Living Document—Not a One-and-Done
Advance care planning isn’t something you do once and file away forever. Your values and preferences can and will change over time, and that’s okay. Revisit the conversation regularly—when you hit a milestone birthday, go through a major life event, or at least once a year.
Need Help Getting Started?
As a death doula, I help individuals and families navigate these conversations. Whether you're unsure of the paperwork or just feel overwhelmed by the idea of talking about it, you're not alone. This is all about living with intention and a plan in place.
It’s never too early to start the conversation.